A Little Jolt!
26 now.
How was my birthday? It was unforgettable. Thanks to my account. I've been feeling depressed a few days before my special day and I was holding on to the thought of going on leave. It was the only thing that kept me sane all throughout the week. I filed for my three-day leave two weeks before May 29 as it was the rule. On the day itself, I felt like all my burdens went poof. After all in a few hours, I'd be munching on food and celebrating my birthday.
Even before midnight struck, my friends already greeted me through webmail. I was feeling a bit down though. I felt like something is not going well in my little world. I was having a little premonition. I could feel it in my bones. I didn't go to Quick Stomach with Owen, Erika and Anggueh. I stayed outside McDonald's with Ben and Arcie. I munched on fries though I promised to keep my hands off them. So much for the diet. I was feeling depressed and I considered that as my comfort food. When we got back to work after our meal, I still had that heavy feeling. At 2:00 am, my supervisor came up to me and informed me that our Recording Agents are now being allowed to put UPTO segments in our schedule for leaves, BUT they need to send it to the Dublin office for approval. What they did was they cancelled all the leaves scheduled from May 29 onwards. Instead of applying the new policy to the leaves filed on May 29 onwards, they cancelled everything regardless whether they were filed months or weeks before. Bottomline: my leaves were cancelled and I was informed at 2:00 am on May 29. On my blasted birthday. My supervisor even told me: "Pearl, may pang birthday ako sa iyo." Perfect.
I was teary-eyed during the rest of my shift. Erika asked me to help her with the light blue sash for the account's General Assembly. I tried to concentrate on squishing glue on the sash and sprinkling glitters on it. I mustered enough strength to stop my tears from flowing. Brendo who was sitting beside me asked why I looked like I was about to cry. I denied it of course, but I logged out for a few minutes to go to my locker so I could text Augy and Iryn. We were informed that we will have a meeting with the RAs so they could explain the new policy. I wanted to crush somebody's head into smithereens. For crying out loud, they ruined my birthday and they had the gall to schedule a meeting on the same date. I would have understood if they told me about the cancellation two days or even a day before my birthday. I would have a few hours to pull my emotions through. I would have had enough time to cheer myself up, think of happy thoughts and just look forward to Friday. I hate broken promises, but I hate false hopes too. It's number two on my list. Unreasonable, Inconsiderate, Unfair, Pathetic.
Before logging out, we were advised by our supervisor to stay for a few minutes so she could talk to us. No meeting with the RAs, but she needed to discuss something. She said the same thing to my teammates. I was in a daze while my other friends were protesting. Anggueh declared that she will be absent if her leaves would get cancelled too. I was sitting there quiet and crestfallen. When the meeting ended, I was one of the first to go. Erika followed behind and I heard her whisper to me about being absent. "Don't let them ruin your day, gurl. I'd go on a sick leave if I were you. Look at me, I went on half-day on my birthday." Her words resonated through my mind while I walked out of the office. Owen approached me to say that he was sorry about what happened. I smiled weakly and just left with Erika and Anggueh. Anggueh told me that she felt for me while we were walking to the bus stop and I wanted to bawl in the middle of the street. I kept mum until we were in Aguinaldo Highway. I received a message from Iryn and I felt the tears flowing while I pressed on my keys to answer her message. I sniffled and wiped my eyes while Anggueh quietly sat beside me. She didn't look at me when she bade me goodbye. Maybe because she understood that I needed time alone to mourn my ruined birthday.
When I got home, I saw my lola in the yard cleaning. First thing that she asked me was if I had work that night because my mom left some money so I could order food from Pizza Hut. My mom never did that. Usually my dad would cook on the weekend after my birthday. (Well, they did on my 18th birthday, but it was because it was on a weekend). He'd prepare pasta, pancit canton and a dessert. They would buy a cake for me too. The thought that my mom decided to celebrate my birthday on the day itself tugged at my heart. I ended up sobbing in my room for 30 minutes oblivious to my lola outside or my brothers sleeping in their room. My chest hurt because I couldn't believe that I was depressed again on my birthday. In May 2004, I felt like I wanted to die even if my Dell Ecare friends prepared a Powerpoint presentation for me that kept flashing on the overhead projector until we went home. Everything changed when I was in Xbox and Augy and I were together. I had wonderful birthdays in two years. Until a few days ago. Thanks to Dublin. If they think their barbecue parties are special, well, so is my birthday!
Augy told me to stay home. I watched the Miss Universe pageant and slept the whole afternoon. I had dysmenorrhea when I woke up so I had a reason to go to the doctor and ask for a medical certificate. I didn't fully appreciate gastritis and dysmenorrhea until that day. I was on sick leave for two beautiful days. I was so sick of those insensitive people that I couldn't stand going to work.
When my lola and I got home, Pizza Hut already delivered our Family Sausage-stuffed crust Bacon Cheeseburger pizza, Pepsi and our free Hawaiian Pan Pizza. My lola also asked Kit to buy lechon manok for dinner. It was a delightful birthday for me in the end. Because sweet, gorgeous, downtrodden princesses get happily-ever-afters!
This afternoon, I went to the mall with my parents, lola and Gem. I bought a choco mocha crunch cake from Red Ribbon for myself. I forgot to ask for a candle. The last time I blew one was on my 11th birthday. I would have wanted to relive the moment on my 26th birthday. Aargh! I'm 26 now!
Another blessing is the carbonara my dad's going to cook for us tomorrow. Hurrah! What's a diet?
***
Even if my birthday turned out okay, hindi ako nakakalimot. Sa susunod na barbecue party, kayo naman ang iiyak.
***
I want to thank everyone who greeted me. I was in tears when I read the messages, but I felt happy because my friends didn't forget. They were tears of joy.
***
Why was I down in the dumps? Why was I so affected by what happened? It was because Augy and I didn't get to celebrate our anniversary and it looks like we wouldn't get to celebrate the two occasions until next Friday. At least I have some things to look forward to.
